Considering they were the biggest British music phenomenon to take the world by storm since The Beatles, it shouldn’t surprise us that the Spice Girls were commoditized the way they were. That being said, there really is no excuse for this mess of a film. It’s obvious that the filmmakers want to emulate A Hard Day’s Night, but it doesn’t take long for the Spice Girls’ tour bus to run into a heaping pile of ‘what the heck just happened?’
The Spice Girls are prepping for a performance at the Royal Albert Hall but the grind of touring wears on them. They are relentlessly pursued by tabloid snakes, wannabe documentarians, and Hollywood producers looking to cash in on the group’s popularity. All they want (all they really, really want) to do is get some fresh air and spend time with their pregnant friend. When their manager tries to prevent them from doing so, the Girls take off, putting their performance at the Hall in limbo.
It’s a shame that concert films weren’t in vogue in 1997 like they are now. Ninety minutes of actual tour footage and backstage antics would have been far more insightful and interesting. Instead, we get a rambling day-in-the-life saga full of screwball comedy clichés that wore out their welcome sometime back during the Ford Administration. The framework is a total rip-off of A Hard Day’s Night (band is stressed, one or more members take off, scramble to get them together for the show) but at least The Beatles had charm.
In Spice World, audiences are served a lukewarm story that depicts the Spice Girls more or less how everyone but their fans saw them- plastic nitwits who sing corny ballads about 90s ‘girl power.’ As with The Beatles, it is clear that, despite whatever stage presence they may have, none of the Spice Girls can act. Lines are stiffly and awkwardly read, not delivered. There is nothing personal or introspective about the script and we cannot even feel sympathy for the girls because no one feels bad for celebrities anymore.
As an American, I can’t help but wonder if Brits got more out of this film than all other nations. All the random cameos and attempts at cheeky British humor fall flat for us because it’s not done well. Do Brits appreciate it simply because they tried to tap into some obligatory Brit humor, or do they resent the Spice Girls all the more because it was a calculated attempt to score points with the home team?
These are some of the deepest questions you can expect to draw from this outright train wreck of a film. Its Generation ADD target audience will soak up the randomness and Crayola-factory-gone-nuclear color pallet, thinking the Spice Girls are so clever. Fans always forgive, but I am not a fan. And I will certainly never forgive anyone involved in making this movie. Run from this one. Run from it as fast as you can.
RATING: 1 out of 5
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